Convincing Dad’s Bathroom

‘So this is what it’s come to?’ I frowned.

‘Apparently,’ my dad frowned back.

‘You know you two make the exact same frowny face,’ my wife laughed from the doorway. ‘It’s adorable.’

‘Not now, Vanessa!’ I glared at her.

‘Oh no, now your frown is frownier,’ she rolled her eyes. ‘Are you two done in here or what?’

‘Yeah,’ my dad nodded. ‘We’re done.’

‘No, we’re not,’ I stepped in front of him before he could leave the bathroom. ‘We need to have this conversation, Dad!’

‘We’ll have it when I’m older and I actually need one of your bathtub solutions for elderly people in Sydney,’ he rolled his eyes.

‘You are older!’

‘I’m middle aged!’ he protested.


‘Clarence, you know I love you,’ my wife stepped onto the tiles to stand next to me. ‘But you’re not going to live to one hundred and forty, I’m so sorry to tell you.’

‘Fine,’ he crossed his arms. ‘I’m getting older. I’m still mobile.’

‘Is that right?’ I asked.


‘Then why haven’t you left this bathroom yet?’

‘Because you’re in my way!’

‘And you can’t push past me?’

‘Because I don’t want to knock you down onto the tiles,’ he growled, stepping closer to me.

‘Okayyyy,’ Vanessa stepped between us. ‘Time out. You,’ she gestured at me, ‘go sit down over there.’

‘On the toilet?’ I raised an eyebrow.

‘Go on,’ she gestured with her head. I grumbled, but did as I was told.

‘And you,’ she said to my dad. ‘Tell me: why don’t you want a nice company to come and modify a bathtub within your home and make your life easier.’

‘Because I don’t need it!’ he almost-whined. ‘I can still move around just fine.’

‘So what will this hurt?’ she asked with a smile. ‘It can only be a positive.’

‘Because,’ he whispered. ‘I can look after myself.’

‘Or,’ she said gently, ‘you could let us look after you. Because we’re family.’